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A Girl Named PJ

Turning Envy Into Motivation

January 10, 2014

1972 VW beetle carEarlier this week, Joy Cho revealed on Oh Joy! that one of her 2014 goals is to kick envy in the face. After admitting she sometimes feel envious of what others have, Joy shared her intention of using her envy to motivate her towards her goals.

Envy is a toxic emotion, one that I wish I didn’t feel so frequently. Although I’m occasionally envious of my friends, the green-eyed monster most often rears its ugly head when I’m reading someone’s blog or looking at their Instagram photos. And since I spend a lot of time online, I’m constantly being bombarded with news and images of other people’s acquisitions and accomplishments.

When I’m suffering from blogging-induced envy, I usually just unsubscribe to the blogs or unfollow the individuals on Twitter and Instagram that are the sources of my discomfort. While it may temporarily alleviate my envy, that passive approach doesn’t get me any closer to getting the things I want (whatever it is those people have).

friends talking in cafeFollowing Joy’s lead, I’d like to manifest my envy into something productive this year (although I’m sure I’ll still need to click “unfollow” from time to time). I have some big plans for the blog in 2014, including a complete redesign next month! So instead of trying to fight the green-eyed monster, I’d rather use that energy on improving and growing the blog. And I need your help.

So can we talk?

I’d love know how I can work harder to make my blog more enjoyable for you, the reader. What type of content would you like to see more of this year? Are there any new topics you’d like me to cover? Your feedback (via comments, email, or even Facebook messages) would be such a huge help!

PS – A good reminder: Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.

(images via Remodelista)

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10COMMENTS | Life

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Let’s Discuss

  1. UNCLE D

    January 10, 2014 at 9:34 am

    Oh PJ
    You have no idea how much you and I have in common
    I too suffer daily as you do, believe it or not

    We truly have to have a one on one some day

    We might be able to help each other

    Because it sucks being this way continuously

    Reply
    • PJ

      January 12, 2014 at 3:37 pm

      Sending you a great big hug đŸ™‚

      Reply
  2. catherine gacad

    January 10, 2014 at 12:25 pm

    i think envy is a good thing! when i’m envious or jealous of a blog, i nit-pick what specifically i love about it. then i try to incorporate those specifics into my own blog. so it’s more like i have an appreciation, vs envy.

    personally, i love bloggers who are brave. those who aren’t scared to tell readers what’s really going on in-between their ears. i’ve written some pretty personal posts about religion and politics and i’m proud of the fact that my readers know who i really am. that’s my personal opinion, however, because obviously there are a lot of blogs out there that are design or fashion-oriented that get a lot of traffic and we wouldn’t know anything about who the bloggers are.

    Reply
    • PJ

      January 12, 2014 at 3:40 pm

      Thanks, Catherine! It can be scary to publish personal posts, but there’s a sense of relief or maybe just camaraderie when a reader responds with “I feel that way too!” My struggle is finding the balance between personal/”dear diary” type posts and entertaining/informative posts.

      Reply
  3. Heather from Poppy Haus

    January 10, 2014 at 8:48 pm

    PJ, it’s the downfall of what we do. I don’t actually follow that many blogs, because I get too distracted by what other people are doing to keep focus on what I’m trying to do. I will always be your fan, and I always look forward to your point of view. Can’t wait to see the redesign!

    H

    Reply
    • PJ

      January 12, 2014 at 3:44 pm

      Thanks, Heather! I definitely don’t read as many blogs as I used to — partly because of time and partly because I also get distracted by other people’s “stuff.” I’m happy to have you as part of my mutual admiration society — so glad we met at Alt last year and wish that I were going so we could hang out again!

      Reply
  4. Joy

    January 12, 2014 at 7:11 am

    Wasn’t it heartening to see that Joy Cho gets jealous too? Her blog is so popular and so beautiful, she has that gorgeous office space, and her little family always seems so happy — and still, she’s struggling with the same things we all are. I thought it was really brave of her to show such vulnerability. The sentence that resonated most with me was, “I want to own a house, too? Well, then I’ll work my butt off to save and save and get one of my very own.”

    I’ve been thinking of that line non-stop ever since I read it! Not just because I, too, would love a house (with a yard!), but because I feel like it opens me up to pushing past my own self-limiting thoughts. My unofficial motto for this year is “Why not?” in all its incantations. Just think about all the things you’ve ever envied that you now have. It’s all possible!

    P.S. I also think you’re amazing and that you could probably take over the world if you wanted to.

    Reply
    • PJ

      January 12, 2014 at 3:49 pm

      It’s always strange to hear that people I admire for their talents and accomplishments have the same struggles as me. Because I usually think, “Well, if I had so-and-so’s life, I’d be so happy!”

      I think I need to take some time to really acknowledge and appreciate what I have. I’m so busy comparing my small successes to other bloggers’ much bigger successes; sometimes I feel like I’m moving at a snail’s pace compared to everyone else!

      PS – Thank you for the kind words, but by the time I’d be ready to take over the world, you’d probably have already done it đŸ˜‰

      Reply
  5. Ashley

    January 12, 2014 at 10:28 pm

    I definitely think there’s some merit to keeping one’s head down, so to speak, with blogging. You can get held-up by Pinterest browsing alone! I think you have a unique voice and a great talent for writing, so I hope you keep sharing the things that make you happy and draw your interest.

    Reply
    • PJ

      January 13, 2014 at 10:58 am

      Thanks, Ashley! The challenge with keeping my head down is that I’m genuinely curious in other people’s lives, and I love to read blogs to learn about new things. It’s tricky, however, to not let what I read on other blogs to influence what I’m doing or how I feel about myself.

      Oh, and Pinterest? I can totally get caught up in the beautiful images other people have taken, as well as the ones they’ve found. Some people are just SO GOOD at curating images on Pinterest! (Not me!)

      Reply

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