I’ve been struggling with a serious case of envy for the past couple of weeks.
Every few months the green-eyed monster rears its ugly head. The last time I experienced strong feelings of jealousy was back in March when I turned 33.
I think it would be easier to handle my envy if it was directed towards celebrities. I mean, don’t we all wish we were rich and famous? Then I could remind myself that starlets are few and far between and that the chances of any talented actress/musician/model getting a big break are slim.
But I’m not jealous of celebrities (at least not today). I’m jealous of you.
Yes, you. My peers. Ladies with whom I have more in common than Oscar or Grammy winners. Other young women and moms who share their lives via social media.
This time, however, I’m not solely jealous of your blog’s success.
I’m envious of superficial things — where you live, what you wear, the fact that your hair cooperates in humid weather — rather than, say, your acting ability or vocal prowess. For example, I’m jealous that you live on the coast and can take weekend trips to the beach. I’m jealous that you have weekly coffee dates with friends and frequent date nights with your husband. I’m jealous that you wear shoes my long, narrow feet don’t fit into.
I’ve been dealing with these types of complicated emotions long enough to understand that they stem from being discontented with aspects of my own life. I also know that the pictures you share on Instagram and the stories you tell on your blogs don’t paint the whole picture of who you are.
Although I make it a point to be open and honest on Bunny & Dolly (case in point: this blog post), there are still things I choose not to share. Personal matters that only those closest to me know. And I need to remember that, surely, you do the same.
“Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.” – Erica Jong
Mariah designed this month’s Desktop Designs with a quote I chose to remind myself that your life is (probably) not as perfect as it may appear to me. That you have struggles and bad days and regrets. That, like me, you’re not sharing all of the really private, really ugly things. And that I make assumptions about your life because I don’t know the whole story.
Unless your life really is that amazing, in which case, I should stop reading your blog.
Download this month’s desktop wallpaper here!