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A Girl Named PJ

Moving to Washington, DC!

April 6, 2015

moving to washington, dc

My cell phone number has a 202 area code. So when I used to give out my number in Omaha, where the area code is 402, I’d often be misheard.

“No, it’s area code 202 from Washington, DC,” I’d say. “I used to live there after college.”

Well, I’m excited to announce that soon nobody will question my 202 number. We’re moving to Washington, DC!

Six months after separating from the Air Force, my husband started his new career last Monday as a federal consultant. Technically, we’ll be living in Maryland or Northern Virginia, but we’ll be a hop, skip, and a Metro ride away from the nation’s capital.

Asa and I were down in DC with him last week to offer moral support and to start looking for a new place to live. While Jordan was at work, the baby and I spent our days driving through Fairfax, Falls Church, Alexandria, Arlington, McLean, Bethesda, North Bethesda, and Rockville.

We toured apartment buildings, townhouses, and single-family homes.

We felt overwhelmed and discouraged.

At least, I felt overwhelmed and discouraged from house hunting. I can’t vouch for Asa, although I’m sure he was getting sick of riding in the car.

The plan is to continue living with my parents until Levi’s nursery school ends in June. Jordan is staying with family friends in Maryland, and he’ll drive up on the weekends as often as he can. Once we find a place to live, I’m sure I’ll start making more frequent trips down to the area. I’d like to have our new home decorated and move-in ready by the time the school year is over.

An ambitious plan, I know, especially since we have no idea where to live!

If you live in or around Washington, DC, I’d love to hear from you. Do you love your neighborhood? Where are your favorite places to eat, shop, and hang out? It’s been ten years since I lived in the District — and my lifestyle was significantly different, as you can imagine!

(Instagram photos from one of my favorite Washington, DC bloggers, Meg Biram)

 

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14COMMENTS | Life

A quick life update

March 27, 2015

a quick life update: in the hospital with grandma

I was so excited to share my how to frost a cake post on Wednesday in honor of Cakentine’s Day and had more fun original content planned for the rest of this week. Unfortunately, we’ve been dealing with a family emergency these past two days, so all work came to an unexpected halt.

Long story short, I’ve spent the past two days in the hospital with my grandmother. I rode in the ambulance with her to the emergency room on Wednesday because she seemed exceptionally weak and lethargic. She has some type of infection, but it’s not life threatening — thank goodness.

My parents returned from their trip to Belgium last night and were able to relieved me at the hospital. Today I’m playing catch up on everything I’ve neglected the past couple of days. And this afternoon I have a much needed birthday massage scheduled that seriously couldn’t have come at a better time.

I didn’t have a chance to gather links to share this weekend, but if you have some time, I invite you to check out:

  • my quote in this Glitter Guide article on spring cleaning
  • my Home movie review on Cool Mom Picks
  • my piece on improving your credit score with advice from Courtney of You Look Great in Green

I’ll have some big news to share with you next week, plus my first big outfit post, so stick around. Things will (hopefully) be back to normal very soon!

First, a question for you: If I could teach you ONE thing, what would that be? Thanks in advance for your answers!

(Photo from my Instagram. Click here to follow me!)

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1COMMENTS | Life

4 ways to relieve stress

March 11, 2015

Ways to Relieve Stress | A Girl Named PJ

One of the first things I remember learning in Psychology 101 is that there are two different types of stress: distress and eustress.

Distress, or negative stress, is categorized by mental or physical suffering and caused by situations that have a negative effect on us like divorce, illness, or money problems. Thoughts and behaviors like worrying, over-scheduling, and fear can also lead to distress.

Eustress, on the other hand, is defined as “stress that is deemed healthful or giving one the feeling of fulfillment.” It’s essentially good stress that promotes positive emotions and wellbeing. Having a baby, getting a promotion, planning a vacation, or even a challenging physical workout are all examples of situations that cause eustress.

Obviously, the goal is to minimize distress and increase eustress. But that can be really hard, especially when you’re in the throes of multiple major life events — say, moving your family half-way across the country, away from your friends, while your husband looks for a job.

It’s no wonder that Jordan and I frequently feel overwhelmed and agitated. Our primary method of relieving stress is to zone out in front of the TV at night. With all the television we watch, you’d think we’d be totally relaxed — except it turns out that watching TV to relieve stress sometimes just makes things worse.

Ways to Relieve Stress | A Girl Named PJ

So I’ve been thinking about other types of relaxation techniques and ways to relieve stress. Here are a few I plan to try:

Meditation

Joy talks about the success she’s had with self-hypnosis over on her blog, Frock Files. Hypnosis sounds very similar to meditation, which I’ve been meaning to learn how to do for some time now. I’ve download the Calm app but haven’t tried the free guided meditation program yet. The app offers nature sounds and sometimes I’ll listen to rain falling on leaves as I lay in bed, though it usually puts me to sleep. I wonder, does that defeat the purpose?

Homeopathic Remedies 

I recently learned about RESCUE, a line of homeopathic stress relief products designed to help restore your inner calm and regain control during stressful situations. The RESCUE Remedy is a formulation of five flower essences developed by a doctor more than 80 years ago. I’m actually sucking on a black currant-flavored RESCUE pastille as I type (it tastes good!), and I’m not feeling as jittery as I normally do when trying to meet a deadline.

I’m curious to try RESCUE Sleep Liquid Melts, as I frequently feel the most stressed as I’m trying to fall asleep. Thinking about my to-do list and all the things I still need to accomplish can keep me awake for an hour after I’ve climbed in bed.

Ways to Relieve Stress | A Girl Named PJ

Walking

Spending time outdoors was nearly impossible this cold, snowy winter, but now that we’re finally seeing signs of spring, I’m eager to start taking walks around the neighborhood. (I’m sure the dog would love to join me!) Walking, a type of rhythmic exercise, can be a mindfulness relaxation technique when you focus on your movement and your breath.

Plus, fresh air and a little Vitamin D is always helpful.

Unplugging

I spend a lot of time online, both on my computer and my iPhone. When I’m not writing, I’m (obsessively) checking social media and, inevitably, falling down the Internet rabbit hole. Unfortunately, social media networks — and Facebook, in particular — have been proven to increase our anxiety.

While I can’t (and don’t really want to) cut out Twitter, Instagram, and blogs completely, I’d like to routinely unplug from technology and use that time for a little self-care. Perhaps walking the dog while listening to a guided meditation podcast and chewing a RESCUE pastille?

I’d love to know how you manage the stress in your life, whether you’re dealing with distress or eustress. Let’s talk about stress relief and relaxation techniques in the comments below!

PS – How to take a 60-second relaxation break. And the two things that helped me break my chronic nail biting habit (though I sometimes bite them when I’m stressed).

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.

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2COMMENTS | Life

DIY envelope iPad case

March 10, 2015

DIY Envelope iPad Case | A Girl Named PJ

Since moving back to New Jersey, I’ve had the opportunity to attend a couple of press events with some of my favorite brands. I visited the Nod Family Home in the fall, and earlier this year, I went to a Minted Makers gathering to check out Minted’s new fabric.

Interestingly, both events had a DIY component: I stenciled with Lotta Jansdotter and The Land of Nod and made DIY envelope iPad covers (and laptop covers) out of Minted fabric with Jenni Radosevich of I Spy DIY. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to feeling intimidated by the crafting component at each event. I joked with the other attendees about my so-called DIY black thumb, which I realize was my attempt to lower everyone’s expectation of the quality of my work — including my own.

At The Land of Nod event, I sat across from Tina Roth Eisenberg of Swissmiss, who started drawing and cutting her own Batman stencil while Lotta was still explaining the process. As the rest of the table got to work stenciling, I sat dumbfounded, unsure what to print on my little fabric bags.

After what felt like forever, I decided to make Levi a bag to hold some of his tools. I searched Google Images for pictures of a hammer and a screwdriver and tried my best tracing the graphics onto the stencil paper. Then I used an X-ACTO knife (for the first time ever?) to cut them out.

Were my lines straight? Nope. Did they have some jagged edges? You bet. But I cut those suckers out.

As I got to work stenciling my hammer and screwdriver onto the fabric bag, a funny feeling came over me. I felt proud of my work. It wasn’t perfect, but it was mine.

And then other people began noticing my work…and complimenting me on it. Even Michelle from Nod gave me her approval! (Naturally, I joked that Nod could license my pattern for a line of products. The offer’s still on the table, Michelle!)

That validation from my peers gave me the confidence to attempt cutting another stencil, although I ended up needed a bit of help from Lotta on that one. Making circles with an X-ACTO is no joke!

DIY Envelope iPad Case | A Girl Named PJ

DIY Envelope iPad Case | A Girl Named PJ

I had a similar experience making my DIY envelope iPad case at the Minted Makers event. I joked with the other participants (most of them Minted community designers!) about my lack of crafting abilities, secretly worrying that I’d somehow mess up Jenni’s pattern.

I can’t cut in a straight line. Haha!

My edges don’t line up. Haha!

I should have done this step before that one. Haha!

But you know what? At the end of the night, my iPad case looked just as good as the lot of them. Did some of them have straighter edges and more thoughtful details like a full interior lining? Sure. But mine turned out just fine.

DIY Envelope iPad Case | A Girl Named PJ

And I had fun. So much fun that I even brought home extra fabric and supplies to make another DIY envelope case — or rather, to remake my iPad case with a few less errors.

What can I say? I’m a perfectionist.

Does this mean I’m going to start posting DIY projects on the blog? Probably not. I’ll leave those to the professionals like my friends Sarah Hearts, Oleander and Palm, The Crafted Life, and Pars Caeli.

However, now I can’t tell people that I don’t have a crafty bone in my body. I’m actually quite creative (at least my husband and mom say I am), and while I may not initiate a DIY project on my own, I’m certainly able to follow instructions. I don’t give myself enough credit at times, and I wonder if you can relate.

DIY Envelope iPad Case | A Girl Named PJ

If you want to try your hand at crafting, you should give I Spy DIY’s envelope laptop case a shot. I made mine slightly smaller to fit an iPad instead of a computer. Then full instructions and template are on her blog (and a video tutorial is here), but you’ll need:

  • Fabric
  • Felt
  • Ribbon
  • Crafting slide buckle
  • Fabric glue
  • Marker
  • Scissors
  • Ruler
  • Paint brush

How do you feel about DIY projects? Do you enjoy working on them or would you rather buy what you need instead of making it? And what are some of your favorite DIY blogs?

DIY Envelope iPad Case | A Girl Named PJ

(photos from the Minted Makers event)

 

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6COMMENTS | Life

Are you introverted or shy?

February 10, 2015

introvert or shy? photo by Joanna Skrzypczak | A Girl Named PJ

On a commuter train into New York City a few months ago, I sat behind two women having a lively conversation about introversion and extroversion. Actually, it was more of a lively one-sided conversation directed by a loud and enthusiastic Chatty Cathy, who must have been running on Energizer batteries.

Based on what I could hear, I assumed Chatty Cathy was an extrovert. Since I’ve always associated my own introversion with being shy – and train lady certainly didn’t sound shy – there was no way she was an introvert, too.

Except that she was (or at least she claimed to be). Comparing herself to a coworker, she explained that while her colleague always felt buzzed after big work events, she craved downtime. Was Chatty Cathy actually an outgoing introvert?

The reason I was heading into the city, I should mention, was to attend an event hosted by The Land of Nod. Although I was thrilled to have been invited, I was also anxious about the evening ahead. What if I didn’t know anybody else there? What if nobody talked to me? What if I was the worst at crafting among the bunch?

It turns out that I didn’t suck at stenciling as much as I had anticipated, and although it took me a short while to warm up to the small crowd of bloggers, I was able to socialize (mostly) at ease. By the end of the event, I felt energized. Pumped. Motivated. I didn’t want to sit on the train for another 40 minutes; I wanted to do something.

Hold up. If attending The Land of Nod event gave me a buzz rather than draining my energy, could I really be an extrovert?

introvert or shy? photo by Joanna Skrzypczak | A Girl Named PJ

In pursuit of answers, I borrowed the e-book version of Quiet by Susan Cain from my neighborhood library. Ever since I watched the author’s fascinating TED Talk on “The Power of Introverts,” the book had been on my to-read list. Once I had it in my hands (well, on my iPad), I devoured it.

A self-described introvert, Cain uses psychological research, brain chemistry, and her own personal experiences to explain the differences between extroversion and introversion. She discusses society’s “extrovert ideal” and the bias against introversion in a way meant to encourage and empower the one-third of us who are introverted.

Yep, us.

Reading Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, I found myself highlighting paragraph after paragraph of text that seemed to be describing me exactly…

My conversation habits:

Introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. They prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family. They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror of small talk, but enjoy deep discussions.

Why I enjoy blogging:

Introverts are more likely than extroverts to express intimate facts about themselves online that their family and friends would be surprised to read, to say that they can express the “real me” online, and to spend more time in certain kinds of online discussions.

My struggle to stay present-minded:

If you leave them to their own devices, the introverts tend to sit around wondering about things, imagining things, recalling events from their past, and making plans for the future. The extroverts are more likely to focus on what’s happening around them. It’s as if extroverts are seeing “what is” while their introverted peers are asking “what if.”

Why some people actually think I’m extroverted:

In other words, introverts are capable of acting like extroverts for the sake of work they consider important, people they love, or anything they value highly.

Cain also covers the differences between shyness and introversion, describing shyness as “the fear of social disapproval or humiliation” and introversion as “a preference for environments that are not overstimulating.” Shyness is inherently painful, she writes, while introversion is not.

So you can be a shy introvert, but you don’t necessarily have to be shy to be introverted. For example, Bill Gates is a non-shy introvert, Cain said, while Barbra Streisand is a shy extrovert.

If you’re interested in learning more about your own introversion or seeking tips about living with an introverted spouse or child, I’d highly recommend picking up a copy of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. I’m actually considering buying a hard copy of the book so I can reread pertinent sections with a physical yellow highlighter in hand.

Do you think you’re an introvert, an extrovert, or an ambivert? Do you ever act introverted in some situations and extroverted in others? This topic fascinates me, and I’d love to know if it interests you as well!

(photos by Joanna Skrzypczak via Booooooom)

 

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8COMMENTS | Life

How to make introductions (a networking lesson from Bridget Jones)

February 2, 2015

how to make introductions | A Girl Named PJ

If you follow along on Instagram, you probably figured out that I recently attended Alt Summit. I can’t believe I neglected to mention on the blog that I was going!

This was my fourth Alt Summit conference, my third time in Salt Lake City, and my second time as a speaker. Besides hosting a roundtable on rebranding your blog, I went to Alt to learn more tips and tricks about blogging and to make introductions. A huge part of Alt Summit is networking, or introducing yourself to other bloggers and to brands with whom you’d like to partner.

One of my goals of this particular Alt Summit was to hone my skills as “Connector,” one of three personality types described by Malcolm Gladwell in his bestseller, The Tipping Point. (The other two? Maven and Salesman.)

how to make introductions at Alt Summit | A Girl Named PJ

I’m not sure I’d consider myself a full-fledged Connector. Although I know a relatively large number of people (I scored a 40 on Gladwell’s test!), I wouldn’t necessarily say I have a “knack for making friends” — partly because I often feel very shy in social situations. And I’d never call myself an expert in cultivating connections!

However, in the spirit of being generous (my word for 2015), I made a conscious decision to make as many introductions as I could among the bloggers and brands I knew in attendance.

How to make an introduction (according to Emily Post)

According to Emily Post, there are a few rules to remember when making introductions, but here’s the most important one: When introducing two people, you want to speak to the person you wish to honor first. That includes anyone older than you, anyone senior in rank to you, the guest of honor at an event, or a woman.

Yes, when it comes to the etiquette of introductions, women rank higher than men. Sorry, guys.

Put into practice, a proper introduction might sound something like:

… “Mom, I’d like you to meet my roommate, Stephanie.”

… “Ms. Boss Lady, I’d like to introduce you to my husband, Jordan.”

… “Rachel, this is my friend, Ross Geller.”

how to make introductions at Alt Summit | A Girl Named PJ

How to make an introduction (according to Bridget Jones)

When making introductions at a party, though, I think it’s OK to be more informal. So while introducing blogging friends at Alt Summit, I sort of disregarded Emily Post’s rules and instead focused on including some thoughtful details about each person.

I thought I had read about that technique in an etiquette book or an article about networking, but now I’m pretty sure I lifted it straight out of Bridget Jones’s Diary:

Ah. Introduce people with thoughtful details. Perpetua, this is Mark Darcy. Mark is a prematurely middle-aged prick with a cruel raced ex-wife. Perpetua is a fat-ass old bag who spends her time bossing me around.

In case you aren’t familiar with the book (or the movie, which is one of my favorites) that was actually Bridget’s inner monologue. What she really said out loud was:

Ah, Perpetua. This is Mark Darcy. Mark is a top barrister. Comes from Grafton Underwood. Perpetua is one of my work colleagues.

how to make introductions at Alt Summit | A Girl Named PJ

I’d like you to meet…

Instead of a formal recap of what I learned at Alt, I thought I’d introduce you to a few of the amazing women I met there — with some thoughtful details, of course. Some of them I was meeting for the first time, and some for the first time in person. (As a blogger, I virtually “know” a lot of people.)

Tiffany Han is a business coach for the highly-creative woman who basically radiates positive energy. She also hosts an awesome podcast where she interviews the creative people who inspire her the most. (I’ve previously mentioned “Raise Your Hand Say Yes” in my post about podcasts.)

Megan Tsang is a talented photographer who recently relocated from San Francisco to Alabama. She made kick-ass business cards out of Instax photos, and if she’s ever in the New York City area, I hope we can collaborate!

Gilit Cooper was one of my roommates at The Grand America. She writes a blog called Shoes Off Please, runs a business called The Bannerie, and basically rocks my world. If you’re a boss babe in need of a glitter banner, Gilit is your girl.

My other roommate was Kaylynn Young of Among the Young. With her gorgeous smile and love for everything sequins, the girl literally sparkles. Kaylynn also reps Agnes & Dora, makers of the softest, stretchiest leggings in the world.

Oakley and I met the first night at the Munchkin dinner. Her son, Welles, has Down Syndrome, and she writes about their experiences on Nothing Down About It. I got to meet Welles at the conference, and I can confirm that he’s just as adorable in person as he is on Oakley’s blog!

how to make introductions at Alt Summit | A Girl Named PJ

It’d be impossible to mention all of the talented bloggers, creatives, movers and shakers I met at Alt Summit in one blog post, so be on the look out for more shout-outs in the weeks ahead!

(Photos by Justin Hackworth or Brooke Dennis for Alt Summit)

 

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7COMMENTS | Life

Building momentum

January 13, 2015

Building momentum - skateboarding

Three weeks.

That’s how long it’s been since my last post, but it wasn’t the plan.

When I decided to take some time off from blogging at the end of December, I was hoping a break would be just what I needed to recharge my batteries.

I was beginning to feel burned out from juggling the demands of motherhood and work as we rounded the corner on our fourth month of living with my parents. All of the stress was stifling my creativity… which made writing a challenge… which added to my stress… and so on.

Between Christmas and New Year’s Eve, I deleted the Facebook and Twitter apps from my phone to minimize distractions. (Not Instagram, though. I have too much fun sharing my photos.) I didn’t log into my dashboard or check my stats on Google Analytics.

I needed a quiet mind in order to make room for new, inspired ideas.

Unfortunately, my big plan backfired. Not only was I unable to quiet my mind (the harder I tried not to think about blogging, the more I thought about it), but as the end of winter break grew nearer, I still felt drained. Because I had slowed down to almost a full stop, I hardly had energy to pick up where I left off.

Building momentum - skateboarding

And then, we all got sick. Every single one of us. A week-plus of coughing and fevers and sinusitis and bronchitis and ear infections. A household on antibiotics.

Nobody slept well.

Nobody worked.

Everybody felt miserable.

Thankfully, we’re all on the mend. Not 100% yet, but much better.

But writing still feels like a challenge to me because during my last three weeks of inertia, I seem to have lost my momentum.

The minute that we lose momentum, we lose the thread. We become extremely vulnerable to distraction and defeat. Our inner critic awakens, and we start second-guessing ourselves, doubting the possibility of success. Other people’s demands creep in, vying for our attention and focus.

This is so true for me. Can you relate?

Building momentum - skateboarding

One way to build momentum for creative projects, according to the article, is to set small, achievable goals. The idea is that experiencing incremental success creates confidence, and confidence creates momentum.

With that in mind, I’m considering cutting back my posting to three times a week for a while. It’s not because I’m trying to slow down or quit. I’m just trying to set myself up for success as I get back into the swing of things.

Which brings me to a question: How often do you go online to read your favorite blogs, including A Girl Named PJ? Daily? A few times a week? Only on weekends?

(skateboarding images by Jordan Voth)

 

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8COMMENTS | Life

Truly Last Minute Thanksgiving Decorations

November 26, 2014

Last minute Thanksgiving decorations and printables | A Girl Named PJ

It’s almost turkey time! Well, not quite for us — we’ll be having a pescatarian Thanksgiving tomorrow with JB’s family in Austin. This year, I’m very thankful for salmon!

We’re actually in Texas now, trying maximize our short time together as a family. We’d like to check out the Thinkery and the Dino Pit at Zilker Park. Also on the agenda: BBQ, preferably Franklin Barbecue, but I’m happy to “settle” for The Salt Lick. And I’m not leaving Austin without stopping at Gourdough’s for doughnuts.

Because priorities.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I’m so grateful to have you as readers. Writing is so much more fun with an audience! And I’m very grateful to have the support of my guy, who always encourages me to keep going even on my most challenging days.

To help make your Thanksgiving feel a little bit more festive, here are nine (actually, 10!) printable decorations for your tabletop and decorations. Most of them are free, and all of them are easy enough to print and create at the very last minute.

  1. Draw Together Thanksgiving Set (perfect for kids!)
  2. “Thankful For…” cards
  3. Thanksgiving table turkey DIY and printable place mats
  4. Thanksgiving table printable set: utensil holder envelopes, “I’m thankful” cards, and conversation starters
  5. Feathered fun for the kids’ table: DIY Turkey Time accessories
  6. Hand lettered “Grateful for…” cards
  7. A thankful turkey centerpiece
  8. Printable fall leaves
  9. An elegant Thanksgiving printable collection

Enjoy the holiday weekend, and I’ll see you back here on Monday!

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0COMMENTS | Family Life

Gift Guide: For Coffee Lovers

November 12, 2014

The way I see it, there are two kinds of coffee drinkers: those who enjoy it for the taste and those who consume it for the caffeine kick. Before JB and I had a lesson in manual brewing, I was content drinking pretty much anything as long as it came with a buzz.

Since then, however, we’ve become slightly obsessed with attaining the perfect cup of coffee at home. It’s been fun experimenting with different roasts, grinds, and brewing methods. (Our favorite, so far? The Chemex.)

Here are 11 gift ideas for coffee lovers that may inspire them to put down their Starbucks holiday drink and embrace the art of simple brewed coffee… READ MORE!

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4COMMENTS | Life

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