A Girl Named PJ

#LetsTalkBums

Here’s something they don’t tell you before you have a baby: After a vaginal birth, you won’t be able to wipe your own ass.

Instead, you’ll be given a peri bottle to, ahem, clean your lady parts after going to the bathroom. Then you can air dry or gently pat with toilet paper. But no wiping!

Things will be sore and messy for a while down there — after all, giving birth is traumatic on your body — and a peri bottle is surprisingly efficient at cleansing. If you had tearing, an episiotomy, or stitches, you’ll also find that rinsing with warm water is actually pretty soothing (it also helps with hemorrhoids).

Now that I’m seven weeks postpartum, I don’t need to use my peri bottle anymore, but there’s something to be said about combining wet and dry cleaning methods in the bathroom. Sometimes you just want to feel a little bit, erm, fresher down there. However, remembering to fill a plastic squeeze bottle with warm water before sitting on the toilet is kind of a pain in the ass (pun intended).

An easy solution would be to steal a package of Levi’s or Asa’s baby wipes, but baby wipes are not flushable. We already had to repair our sewer line once shortly after we moved in; I’m not interested in risking another repair.

I’m also not interested in purchasing another Diaper Genie for my own personal use. Could you imagine?!

A better solution is using Cottonelle Fresh Care Flushable Cleansing Cloths in conjunction with toilet paper (Cottonelle Clean Care TP, perhaps?). They clean like diaper wipes but feature SafeFlush Technology that makes them sewer- and septic-safe. Wipes designed to break down immediately after flushing? Genius!

Plus, Cottonelle’s flushable cleansing cloths come in a nondescript OneTouch dispensing tub, making them much less conspicuous on the back of the toilet than a box of baby wipes. (My photos show the dispenser still packaged up. It’s simply solid black underneath.)

It’s time to come clean. How do you feel about using a wet + dry combo in the bathroom? Would you try flushable wipes? Click here to learn more!

Thanks to Cottonelle for sponsoring today’s discussion!

MJ from Pars Caeli is taking over the blog today so I can get some sleep and possibly shower while the baby naps! 

Dear Mom of Two,

Well done! And welcome to life with two bundles of joy. Heartfelt congratulations on your growing family and your hard work to get you right where you are now.

I’m not one to throw out a ton of advice, and even if I were, we both know you have no time to read it. So, let’s keep it simple, sister, and let me share with you three tidbits that helped me with my toughest parenting transition.

1. Celebrate the new normal

Remember when you could put your child down for a nap or tuck her in for the night and let out the big exhale? Well, times have changed and, for now, you’re on for two people who need you a whole lot for a whole lot of time. Your down time has been squished and sandwiched. Give yourself a break, and take the time away when you can, and embrace the time together, even if you’re both crying.

Likely, for at least a short time, you’ll feel more tired and more impatient than you ever expected. And if you’re not, well then there’s another reason to celebrate. Watch your two littles observe one another. Where you can, help them watch the newness wear off as a larger family is created.

2. Rejoice in all you know… and all you have to learn

This is your second time around, and you will never have that moment again of questioning how will you get the onesie on over your infant’s head (or maybe that was just me). You have your own momma groove of how to hold a baby while taking on world domination.

But also, you’re likely to feel like an uncomfortable freshman again, wondering why your learning from child #1 isn’t always helpful with this new little being and his/her variety of quirks. And to this, I say, laugh at yourself – often. No one knows the inner secrets of this new human. Or how strange your firstborn might act in hopes of getting some extra attention his way as he adjust to this sibling.

Embrace your role as an active learner. You’re modeling exactly what you’d hope your children would be.

3. There is no time (or reason) for guilt

A few months ago, you may have scoffed at the mother who let her young daughter play on her phone while she caught a few moments of quiet. You may have judged your neighbor who is always pushing his son into play dates. Maybe even the family who spends too much time watching TV.

Well, fact is, friend, you just might need to fall on some of these helpers yourself. And, when used wisely, there is nothing wrong with any of these activities.

And more importantly, there is no room to feel guilty about these adjustments you’re making in your parenting style.

Remember that this is not forever. And that my kids have all learned incredible animal facts from watching “Wild Kratts” on PBS Kids. And spending time on playdates has opened their eyes to how others live, and, dare I say, made them more empathetic.

Don’t feel weird about asking for help, even if it’s from your remote control.

Get some sleep and shower when you can. And enjoy having another person to love.

xoxo, MJ