A Girl Named PJ

Breaking the nail biting habit

July 10, 2014

Levi is a nail biter, and I think it’s my fault.

No, I didn’t teach my almost-three year old how to bite his nails. But I’m a reformed (well, mostly reformed) nail biter, and according to Levi’s pediatrician, the bad habit is genetic.

Or did he learn the behavior by watching me? I’ll admit it: When I’m feeling overwhelmed or particularly stressed, my fingernails sometimes find their way back into my mouth.

Unfortunately, breaking the nail biting habit in a child is different than breaking the habit in an adult. When I was in my twenties, these were the two things that helped me stop biting my nails:

Acrylic nails. When my nails were painfully short, I would get acrylics. Not only was it harder to bite plastic tips, but concealing my chewed-up fingernails made me feel more confident. More confidence somehow equaled less nail biting.

Regular manicures. When my natural nails grew long enough, I’d have the acrylics removed and get regular manicures to maintain the length. Yes, the acrylics probably made my nails weaker, but keeping them polished helped prevent them from immediately breaking. I was less likely to bite my nails when they looked clean and colorful, but I’d have to get them repainted at the first sign of chipping or else I’d pick (or chew) off the peeling nail polish.

Obviously, I’m not about to put acrylics on Levi’s nails. I suppose I could paint his nails with sparkly or neon polish, but I’m not sure my three-year-old son needs to be sporting a full manicure. An alternative might be a bitter-tasting nail biting treatment combined with a children’s book about bad habits. However, if Levi really does share my nail biting genes, it’s likely he’d either get used to the taste of the treatment or realize he can pick it off his nails!

I suppose I could do nothing and just wait for Levi to outgrow his nail biting habit. According to this Washington Post article, chronic nail biting most commonly begins in childhood, peaks in adolescence and then tapers off — and only 10 to 20 percent of adults still bite their nails.

Yeah, right. I have to do something. It’s unsanitary for Levi to constantly have his hands in his mouth (despite our best efforts to have him frequently wash his hands, they’re bound to pick up germs), and he chews his nails down so far that he’s complaining they hurt. Plus, if he’s biting his nails because he’s feeling anxious about something, I want to teach him better ways to cope.

Have you had success breaking your child’s nail biting habit? Were they as young as Levi? I’d love to hear how you did it!

PS – An ombre manicure to try at home and my secret to making manicures last a week. Also, what do you think about boys wearing nail polish?

(my Instagram photo)

Summer braids and braided hairstyles

July 8, 2014

The morning of my Alt Summit panel on Growing a Small Blog, I had my hair braided by the incredibly talented Rubi Jones. A complementary braiding appointment was one perk of being an Alt Summit speaker — and a highlight of the conference for me.

While some of my fellow speakers brought in pictures of hairstyles for Rubi to emulate, I told her that she could do whatever she wanted with my hair. After all, she’s known as the “Braid Whisperer” for a reason! Rubi created a beautiful, slightly messy braided hairstyle similar to the top photo. I loved the look so much that I refused to undo my ballerina-meets-J.Crew-inspired updo for three days.

Since Alt, I’ve tried in vain to create summer braids similar to Rubi’s handiwork. I can French braid my own hair (a skill I acquired during 11th grade history), but that’s it. I can’t figure out how to manipulate my hair into a braided crown, a side French braid, or all-over braids.

But I’m determined to learn. On her own blog, She Lets Her Hair Down, Rubi has an entire category of hair tutorials. The mini crown braid above looks easy enough for me to master — that is, if my hair is long enough!

If you’re interested in learning how to braid, here are a few more hair tutorials on other blogs worth checking out, too:

Do you ever braid your own hair? If you have a favorite braid tutorial, please share the link in the comments!

PS – You can find more of my favorite hairstyles and tutorials on my (aptly named) Hairstyle board.

(top two images via Rubi Jones; bottom image via She Let’s Her Hair Down)

Asa’s monthly baby photo (four months old)

July 7, 2014

Dear Asa,

Shortly after you turned three months old, Daddy and I tried putting you to bed in a Sleep Sack instead of a swaddle. Your big brother, Levi, was 11 weeks old when he transitioned out of his swaddle, so we thought you might be ready around the same age. We were also hoping that you might sleep for longer stretches overnight if your arms were free; you’re becoming quite the finger- and thumb-sucker.

Silly us. While you were sleeping, you rotated a quarter turn clockwise, flipped over from your back to your tummy, and woke up hysterical. It was the first time you rolled over, and just like Levi, it happened overnight! You’ve only rolled over one other time since, which is surprising considering how much you rock side to side during tummy time.

You’re now reaching for the toys attached to your BabyBjorn bouncer and swinging at the toys dangling above your play mat and mamaRoo. You can loosely hold soft toys like your Whoozit and knit rattle, too, although you’d much rather grab my hair. You’ve also started grabbing your feet, a new discovery this month.

Cuddling with a blanket while swinging is still your preferred way to nap, and you’re getting slightly better at keeping your pacifier in your mouth. Once you even tried putting it back into your mouth after it fell out!

I’ve heard that second-born children are more easy-going than their older siblings, and so far that seems to be true for you. Your daily schedule sort of depends on Levi’s needs that day. For example, sometimes I have to move you from your swing to your car seat while you’re napping, and you generally don’t make too much of a fuss. You’re also content to sit in your car seat for an extended period of time, like if we go out to dinner. I vaguely remember Levi being more of a pain in that regard.

Your Mr. Serious-persona is quickly transforming into Mr. Adorable. You’re generous with your smiles and laugh much more frequently, including when we tickle you! You’re also very chatty (in a high-pitched, squeaky kind of way), and I sometimes catch you just cooing to yourself.

This month you had your first taste of formula when I had to go out of town for four days. I expressed breast milk for you to drink but wasn’t able to pump enough for all of your feedings. I felt incredibly guilty about giving you formula, especially since Levi was exclusively breastfed, but it’s not like you could go without milk. So I picked a carton of formula labeled “For Supplementation” and hoped that you would drink it.

And you did. Mimi stayed over to help Daddy while I was away, and both reported that you didn’t seem to care whether you were drinking formula or milk. Perhaps that was a sign that, unlike Levi, you won’t be a picky eater once you start eating solids.

Similar to last month, you still nurse every three to four hours during the day. Your feeding schedule is roughly 7 am, 10 am, 1 pm, 4 pm, 7 pm, and 10 pm. Unfortunately for Daddy and me, you’re also waking up two times (or more!) at night to eat. You just can’t quit that 1 am-2 am feeding. We will look back at these weeks as the most tired we’ve ever been. Or can ever remember being. (One symptom of sleep deprivation is memory loss.)

Also, you won’t let us put you down in your crib for the night after your 7 pm feeding; we have to wait until after 10 pm. It’s getting really inconvenient to keep going to bed so late.

Metabolically speaking, it’s not like you need the extra milk in the middle of the night. You’re a very healthy 15 lb 11 oz (70th percentile for weight) and 26.25 inches tall (85th percentile). For comparison’s sake, Levi measured 26 inches at four months, but he weighed only 13 lb 7 oz. He could still get away with size 0-3 month clothing when he was your age. You, on the other hand, are a solid size 3-6 months and wear size 2 diapers (that you blow out of way too frequently).

Despite the sleepless nights, I think four months old is my favorite age so far. You are just getting cuter and more expressive by the day!

Love,
Mommy

***

Asa turned four months old on June 26, 2014. I’ll be taking a monthly baby photo of him next to his Blabla doll on his birthday to document his growth the first year.

PS – Asa at one month old, two months old, and three months old. Also, Levi when he was Asa’s age.

7 ways to help dogs cope with fireworks

July 4, 2014

Today is Independence Day, but fireworks have been illuminating the sky in my neighborhood every night this week.

Omaha only recently allowed fireworks to be sold within city limits — and only during the 10 days leading up to the Fourth of July. There are tented fireworks stands set up in nearly every shopping center parking lot, which means that my neighbors (and their teenage children!) have access to enough fireworks to last through August.

Can you detect the hint of annoyance in my tone? I have no problem if you want to set off fireworks in your backyard to celebrate the Fourth of July, but when it becomes a nightly occurrence, the novelty starts to wear off. Explosions are not my favorite sound. Plus, the noise is a constant threat to my sleeping children.

We’re lucky, though, that Briscoe isn’t phased by fireworks, as fear of fireworks is very common in dogs. Most dogs will cower in the corner when the booming begins, but some dogs get so riled up that they tear through screen door, dig under fences, or chew through their crates. Did you know that more dogs are lost on the fourth of July than any other day?

If your dog is afraid of fireworks, here are a seven ways to help ease his anxiety:

Take an extra long walk or engage your dog in vigorous exercise. He may be less able to concentrate on the fireworks if he’s exhausted.
Drown out loud fireworks with soothing music or white noise. You could also try Mutt Muffs, noise-reducing headphones created for dogs flying in airplanes.
Keep your curtains and blinds closed and your lights on to lessen your dog’s ability to see flashes of light outside.
Give aromatherapy a shot. Many dogs find lavender and pine to be especially relaxing scents.
Talk to your vet about using the natural supplement melatonin to keep your dog calm.
Dress your dog in a snug-fitting Thundershirt, designed to reduce stress and anxiety.
Create a safe place for your dog to hide and offer lots of love and sympathy.

Have a safe and happy 4th of July!

Growing a small blog through self-promotion and networking

July 3, 2014

Two weeks ago, Martha Stewart and I spoke at Alt Summit.

No, not together. Martha obviously had top billing. Everyone was super psyched for her keynote, an engaging lunchtime Q&A with Gabrielle Blair of Design Mom. However, a large number of Alt attendees revealed to me and my co-presenters, Ciera, Melissa, Mariah, and Tan, that they were especially looking forward to hearing our panel on Growing a Small Blog.

Knowing that so many people were eager to learn from us was equally exciting and terrifying. What if the information I planned to share about self-promotion and networking didn’t live up to their expectations? What if they stood up and walked out while I was speaking?

Our breakout room was packed. Mariah and I estimated there were 75-100 bloggers in attendance. I was the second person to speak, and as Ciera kicked off the session, I could feel my palms and pits getting sweaty.

And, oh my god, I forgot to include on my notes when to change my slides.

Suddenly, it was my turn. I took a deep breath and cracked a joke about winging it with my slides. I could feel my voice shaking at first, but once the audience laughed for the first time, I began to relax. But just a bit. My heart continued to race for my allotted 15 minutes.

I must’ve had some sort of mind-body disconnect during my portion of the presentation because when it was all over, I could hardly remember what I had said! Still, I felt good about my performance and proud of my friends who presented alongside me.

Then the most amazing thing happened. A handful of bloggers stayed behind to chat with us instead of running out of the room to find a good seat for Martha’s keynote. And others were sharing photos of our slides on Twitter and Instagram using our hashtag #growingasmallblog.

Alt Summit: Where it’s ok to type on your phone while somebody else is talking.

If you’re interested, here are some of the key takeaways from my part of our Growing a Small Blog panel. I spoke specifically about growing your blog through self-promotion and networking. Ciera, Mariah, Melissa, and Tan are also sharing tidbits from their presentations today, so hop over to their blogs for the full scoop. Then download all of our slides here.

Content is king, but promotion is queen. Of course, you need to start with well-written and worthwhile content, but content alone is not enough to grow a readership. The simple truth is that your blog is going to go unread unless you tell people to read it.

One way to create awareness of yourself and your blog is through self-promotion. You can let potential readers find you by:

Distributing your blog posts across all social media platforms, including Pinterest. Drip your content across multiple channels over the course of a day, a week, or even a month using scheduling apps like Buffer, CoSchedule, or Hootsuite.
Including your blog’s URL in your personal email signature.
Tagging other bloggers and brands as often as possible when they’re mentioned in content you’re sharing.
Uploading your best content to community sharing sites relevant to your blog’s topic.

Networking, or building relationships with people who can potentially be helpful, is a type of two-way communication. Successful networking starts with an elevator pitch, a short 15-30 second summary of who you are and what you do.

When brainstorming your own elevator pitch, start with who you are, then what you do, and what your blog is about. You can also include what makes your blog different than other blogs in your niche, or how it adds value to the reader. Practice your elevator pitch out loud until it rolls off the tongue. Since most of us write more formally than we speak, you’ll want to tweak your wording to make it sound more casual.

Conferences like Alt Summit are obvious places for bloggers to network, but some of the most lucrative connections are often made at events not related to blogging. Local workshops, races, even religious activities can introduce you to people with whom you share common interests. Because you never know where you’ll meet the next person who can help you, always talk about your blog — and always hand out your business card!

Also, don’t be afraid to enlist the help of your friends and family. How many of your husbands or parents can explain what your blog is about?

In addition to offline networking, you need to engage online with other bloggers. Creating relationships with other bloggers will ultimately help you expand your blog’s reach. The goal is to leverage their audiences to gain new readers.

Because you likely have a limited amount of time to spend online daily, I recommend networking with intention. Focus your efforts on just five bloggers in the beginning. Then attempt to get on their radars by:

Including their content in round ups and letting them know via email or tweet when you’ve highlighted their posts. If round ups aren’t your thing, get in the habit of regularly sharing content from other blogs on your social media platforms. (Note: It may seem counterintuitive to promote other people when the goal is for them to promote you, but when you network, you should be giving more than you take. Hopefully, they will reciprocate the love in the future.)
Frequently commenting on other blogs, adding value by saying more than just “great post!” Bloggers love comments — and, sadly, conversation is quieting down online — so if you comment consistently on the same handful of blogs, your name will become familiar.

Another way to network online is by participating in Twitter chats like Alt Summit’s #AltChat. They’re a great way to offer other bloggers support, encouragement, and knowledge.

Finally, think outside of your niche. Consider networking with bloggers in neighboring niches who share a similar demographic of reader.

Self-promotion can be time consuming, and networking can sometimes be nerve-wracking, especially if you have the tendency to be a little shy. But if you want to grow your blog, you have to work it. You have to invest your time and put yourself out there.

Yes, sometimes bloggers get a lucky break right out of the gate. I’m so jealous of them! Just remember they are the exception and most of us have to work hard to make our own luck.

Have any additional questions about growing a small blog through self-promotion and networking? Feel free to ask in the comments or send me an email. And don’t forget to download our full slideshow plus worksheet!

(Photos by Justin Hackworth or Brooke Dennis for Alt Summit. Slides by Ciera Design.)

Go Forward >
1
…
45
46
47
48
49
…
189
< Go Back