A Girl Named PJ

i crave what i see

January 14, 2011

I always assumed cravings happened like this: All of a sudden, the need to eat something specific pops into your mind, and it’s all you can think about until you eat it.

I think my cravings work a bit differently. The urge to eat a particular type of food does not appear out of nowhere. Rather, I see something or hear about something that gets stuck in the back of mind, taunting my taste buds. I’ve become extremely impressionable when it comes to food.

For example, I watched a fast food commercial and immediately wanted a hamburger. And seeing a Paul Ferney cake painting on Oh Happy Day! recently had me drooling over the thought of yellow cake with chocolate icing. If we had had cake mix in the house, I probably would’ve baked myself a cake.

{image via Oh Happy Day!}

my first craving

January 5, 2011

I think I’m having my first craving.

Last night, somebody on Twitter mentioned strawberry ice cream, and I can’t get the sweet, creamy dessert out of my head. Twenty-four hours later, I still want some!

I might have JB make his first emergency trip to the supermarket tonight.

Did you have any unusual cravings when you were pregnant?

the first ultrasound

December 29, 2010

This afternoon JB and I went in for a First Trimester Screening. They checked my blood and did an ultrasound to look for evidence of chromosomal disorders like Down’s Syndrome. I was so nervous that they would find something wrong.

But when they turned on the ultrasound machine, there was a baby. A little baby with a little profile. A nose and a chin we could distinctly see. Two legs with two feet and two arms with two hands.

The doctor performing the ultrasound said that the baby had a strong heart and a properly developing brain. He also said it looked like the baby had all ten toes and all ten fingers. The ultrasound evaluation looked good, but we’ll have to wait a couple of days to get the results of the blood work. Once we get the results, as long as they come back normal, we’ll start telling friends the good news. Right now, only our immediate family knows.

When we were alone, JB started crying because he said we created a tiny, perfect creature. But I continued to feel ambivalent. Even though I just saw our baby on the monitor, I didn’t feel an emotional connection yet. I felt nothing.

I don’t understand how some women feel instantaneous love for their unborn children. I wonder when I will feel something.

*I was very hesitant about posting an ultrasound image and ultimately decided I wasn’t comfortable sharing such a private image with the world.

morning sickness is a misnomer

December 20, 2010

For most of the first trimester, I’ve felt as if I were on a boat. I’ve been experiencing constant nausea, as if I were seasick.

I had “morning sickness” for the first time just two days after taking the home pregnancy test. According to BabyCenter, morning sickness starts at about six weeks, which is would’ve been accurate. But morning sickness is a misnomer since you can feel nauseated at any time of the day. That morning it hit me in the parking lot of Whole Foods. I suddenly felt like I might vomit. It passed in about 20 minutes, but I still felt “off” – kinda queasy all over.

When we got home, JB made me a can of chicken soup for lunch, but even after he doctored it up, it tasted so bland that I couldn’t eat it. My cherry 7-up also tasted funny, like it was mostly soda water. It was as if my taste buds has stopped working. Luckily, they returned to normal by dinner.

Still, I’ve spent most of the last month and a half on the couch eating saltines and drinking ginger ale. I’ve had no appetite for anything sweet, and carbs seem to be the only thing to help with the nausea. I guess I should feel grateful that at least I haven’t been throwing up – yet.

{image via x-ray delta one}

the hives (not the band)

November 22, 2010

On Friday I notice a couple of bumps that looked like bug bites and small red splotches on my thighs. Since they itched, I called the dermatologist and made an appointment. Now that I’m pregnant, I’m even more paranoid than usual.

The dermatologist said it was probably just hives. I can recall her saying that 80% of hives are caused by unknown reasons but go away within 24 hours. If they didn’t go away, I would need to come back for a biopsy to check for three things:

Lupus
I don’t remember
A pregnancy-related rash that usually occurs in the third trimester. My dermatologist has only seen it once in the second trimester but never in the first.

Perhaps I should have taken notes while she was talking.

Over the weekend the rash worsened. I was spotted up and down my legs, torso and arms. So on Sunday, while sitting in an oatmeal bath, I phoned the OB/GYN on call. She agreed that it was most likely hives but said they could take a few days to clear up. She didn’t think I needed to come in to see my OB/GYN because I had already been to the dermatologist and should just follow up with that doctor. She also said that hot baths could make the rash worse (oops!). Instead, I could take Benadryl and use Calamine lotion.

By the end of the day, the red “bites” seemed to be going down, and I think I have fewer this morning, but they are definitely not gone, and I’m still very itchy.

I have to say, I am not enjoying being pregnant yet.