Archives for December 2012

Top 5 pieces of advice for new moms

December 20, 2012

They say it takes a village to raise a child, so I’ve invited some fabulous bloggers to share their thoughts on motherhood. This week they’ll be discussing everything from pregnancy to newborns to baby gear for first-time moms. Today, Emily is here with the five pieces of new-mom advice she plans to follow after her second child is born in April. Her blog, Peck Life, is filled with gorgeous photographs of family, food and crafts, so check it out!

When you have your first child, you don’t know what to expect. Is it going to be hard or easy? What will I feel like? Will my marriage change? Will I have time to ever take a shower again? You just never know until that little bundle joins you.

Being the type A personality that I am, it’s very hard for me to let things go….to not be able to cross items off my “to-do” list….or to let the dishes stay dirty in the sink. So when my first baby was born, it’s safe to say I had a pretty difficult time merging my “old” life with the “new” one.

I tried too hard to keep up, got a little too overwhelmed, didn’t take care of myself as well as I should have, and in hindsight {of course!}, now realize that I could have benefited from the advice sprinkled over me those first few months. It’s hard to implement good judgment, especially when you are still in the fog of the first few months. Now, with baby #2 joining us next April, I have a better idea of what I need to do to succeed. Ironically, much of it is the same guidance I was given before. Except this time? It actually means something. Here are my top 5:

It was probably the curse of having December baby combined with the extreme damage to my lower half that prevented me from really “getting out there”, but I can tell you first hand that staying in the house 24/7 really can make you a little insane. Even if you don’t want to go….even if it takes 3 hours to get out the door….just go. Starbucks, 10 minutes in Target, a stroll through the farmers market….a baby support group….ANYTHING.

The beginning of a baby is fleeting. You will have 10,000 photos of your new little person. But where is mom? Even if there has been no shower or drop of makeup applied, just get in the picture. Your baby will thank you for it later.

This is the one I am worst at. I’ve never been a napper EVER so sleeping at sporadic intervals throughout the day is foreign to me. As I’ve become more sleep deprived over the years, I’ve realized just how much sleep I really do need to properly function. I expect it will be easier to sleep on queue with #2 {assuming my toddler lets me} but I’m sure this will still be a difficult one to stick to.

I’m not very good at meal planning when I’m NOT pregnant. So, you can only imagine how this panned out the first time around. Thankfully we had friends and family who helped us with meals. Once I learned just how much food I needed to eat to nurse AND how cranky I got when I was hungry, this quickly became top priority. There is no time for dishes {sorry, I am usually a good environmental steward but desperate times call for desperate measures} so paper plates are a must. Anything you can do to plan ahead, even if it’s meal delivery, will make everyone happy.

Assuming you have a good, safe, relationship with your family members, accept any and all help. Let others hold your baby so you can grab a snack and have 5 minutes of quiet time or grab a quick coffee with your hubby. If they offer to watch your baby, just let them!! It was really hard in the beginning, especially when I was a paranoid first time mom but looking back, I really wish I would have accepted more offers for help, even if the help wasn’t directly for the baby. It’s the one time in your life when you have a right to be spoiled by others. Just accept it and say thank you as much as possible. You can repay them later.

It’s only 5 things, but I really think it will make things smoother for me in this next go around. Is there anything major I’ve left out? Any advice you would give to a new mom that was valuable in your situation? I’d love to hear!

Good luck, Emily! I certainly hope the transition is easier the second time around. In the meantime, I’m so excited to meet you at Alt Summit in January. We’ll both be dining with BHG!

How to have a baby in New York City

December 19, 2012

They say it takes a village to raise a child, so I’ve invited some fabulous bloggers to share their thoughts on motherhood. This week they’ll be discussing everything from pregnancy to newborns to baby gear for first-time moms. Today’s post is special: I asked my friend Ashley from Hither & Thither if she had any advice for my sister, who lives in New York City and is expecting her first baby in early March. Ashley, a former New Yorker, has a son who’s about a week younger than Levi, so I knew she’d have a wealth of information for my sister and other city-dwelling mamas!

First off: congratulations! That anticipation is like nothing else. And hopefully it’s driving you to get rid of everything you own to make room for everything else you’re about to. Just kidding. Sort of.

Of course the space constraints of a New York apartment is the challenge that first comes to mind when asked about having a baby in the city. And I would suggest doing multiple sweeps and either tossing, donating, or storing (hopefully in a willing parent’s home) things you don’t need before there’s a very demanding, sweet little distraction living with you.

And then, start thinking about the kinds of large items and toys you might want, but don’t bother buying any of them until you need them. It’s a tricky balance: ideally, you want to know which swing to order off Diapers.com or from whom you can borrow one before you need it, but you might not want to actually let it in the house until you know that you do. (And p.s. thank goodness for Diapers.com, Fresh Direct, Amazon prime, and Seamless Web. Oh how I miss Seamless Web.)

On the other hand, do be sure to have whatever you need for nursing ahead of time. Bring the pillow and lanolin to the hospital and get the fitting done in advance. (Speaking from experience: driving uptown with a 2-day old for a bra fitting that happened while I shifted from foot to foot was not fun.)

My top items–for any new mom but especially for one in NY: a carrier (wearing the baby on busy streets and in tight restaurants is so nice); a foldable, lightweight stroller (imagine getting it in and out of cabs as well as down subway stairs); and a new iPhone. That last one might be a stretch–but go ahead and ask for one. You’ll use it for all of your photos. You’ll watch movies and entire TV Series on it. You’ll read the NY Times and check email and record every poop on it. And when you’re strolling aimlessly to keep the baby asleep in that carrier, you’ll order delivery from Seamless Web.

Choose a pediatrician you trust, but who is also close-by and easy to get to in rush hour.

Take advantage of the great services and programs for parents all around the city: the Y has new parent meet-ups, music classes, mommy-and-me workouts, and babysitting. The libraries have amazing story hours (and they happen all around the city on different days).

You already know that NY has amazing parks and playgrounds. They’re great places to meet people. “Are you happy with your stroller?” will get most people talking if you’re at a loss. We parents love sharing advice (couched as opinions).

You’d think midday in SoHo would be the time for that neighborhood—but it’s not. It’s never the right time for SoHo–especially with a stroller. Delivery trucks, crowds… argh! Of course, when you do end up there (and somehow I always did, dodging taxis and models), know that Giggle has a nice nursing station, changing table, and scale downstairs; and the NYU bookstore on the North strip of Broadway has a large children’s area adjacent to a coffee shop.

Finally, start mentally collecting restaurants you like that serve breakfast. Breakfast, in general, means kid-friendly. Brunch is more hit-or-miss.

Have fun! New York City is an incredibly awesome place to have a baby and all the cliches are true about it all flying by–even if that brunch in SoHo with all the moody, 22-year-old hipsters starting at you and your crying baby seemed to last an eternity.

hither-and-thither-for-bunny-and-dolly-2

P.S. Here’s a post on raising a City Kid and one on what I packed in my diaper bag when we left the house.

Thank you so much, Ashley! You actually made living in NYC with a baby sound more fun than stressful!

For more great content, please subscribe to Bunny & Dolly’s RSS feed!

Coming to terms with raising a boy

December 18, 2012

They say it takes a village to raise a child, so I’ve invited some fabulous bloggers to share their thoughts on motherhood. This week they’ll be discussing everything from pregnancy to newborns to baby gear for first-time moms. Renee Garner from Wolfie & The Sneak is an artist who blogs about indie design, art, food, motherhood and style. We met on Twitter, and when I learned she was pregnant with her second child, I was eager for her to share her perspective on Bunny & Dolly.

Change is hard for me, so a nine-month pregnancy is just what I need to get used to the idea of having a kid around. I guess we’re all that way, needing the transition in time, and for whatever reason, nine months is the magic number for humans. If it were any longer (elephants…2 years!?!) surely the birth rate would have bottomed out centuries ago.

This time around—my second pregnancy—is slightly different from the first in that I feel better prepared to bring a child into the world. I know firsthand what the sleepless nights are like, and I know the depth of my patience. I know the joys and excitement of each new day, each new skill and the satisfaction of answering each question asked, even when those questions are asked over and over and over again. I’ve lived through the mysteries that came with child #1. But child #1 is a girl, and we just found out that child #2 is a boy.

As you’ve probably deduced, I’m female. So when we found out the gender of #1, there was a quick and vast realization: All my “girl” experiences flashed through my mind—the understanding that the things I have been through will help me guide her. With the worry of bringing new life into the world came a calm; my personal experiences gave me comfort and strength in my ability to be her mother. It was all familiar territory.

It’s been 4 days since we found out #2 is a boy, and these 4 days I’ve been coming to terms with the fact that I have little knowledge of what life will be like for a boy. First, I mourned that this experience wouldn’t allow me to re-live #1’s baby days, an ignorant daydream that subconsciously fueled the decision to have a #2. It didn’t take long to realize the extent of that ignorance, because #2, no matter the gender, will be a unique and amazing individual. After all that inner-transformation, growing and mama-maturing, came the third acceptance: This child will have a penis. The prospect was terrifying and unexpected, it was unfamiliar…it is change.

What do I know about raising a boy? All of that confidence I had in answering the mysteries of bringing a life into the world whooshed out the window with the prospect of needing to stock up on peepee teepees. Luckily, I have my partner Charlie to lean on. He’s excited to share his experiences as a guide for #2 (and for me) through this unfamiliar territory. He knows what boy-ness is like; in fact, that boyishness often peeks through his thirty-something face. It starts with a glint in his eye and spreads across in a broad and confident smile, melting my pregnant nervousness, allowing the excitement of a whole new learning experience to begin.

I really appreciate your honesty about raising a boy, Renee. I felt the same exact way when I learned I was going to be a boy’s mom instead of a girl’s mom, and I’m sure that many readers had similar experiences. Thanks so much for contributing!

PS: You don’t need peepee teepees. Your little guy will manage to pee all over you and his surroundings anyway!

Five Things About Pregnancy

December 17, 2012

They say it takes a village to raise a child, so I’ve invited some fabulous bloggers to share their thoughts on motherhood. This week they’ll be discussing everything from pregnancy to newborns to baby gear for first-time moms. First up: Kat from Living Like the Kings. Kat has one photogenic Peanut–and Peanut’s going to be a big sister soon!

Hi there, friends of Bunny & Dolly. I’m so excited to be here today.

I always find it a little weird to try and sum myself up in a couple of sentences or less, so instead I thought I would tell you 5 facts about me:

I was born and raised in Moscow, Russia and speak Russian fluently
I married a guy that was my roommate
Our little Peanut made me a mom
I work full time in Information Technology
I’m currently pregnant with our second little nugget

When we found out that we were pregnant with our second baby (yes, on purpose), there were a number of things that went through my mind. Since I’ve already started you off with a 5-things list, I thought I’d just keep it going.

5 things I’m excited about during this pregnancy:

Eating 2 (ok, sometimes 3) breakfasts
Feeling the baby move
Watching my belly round out
Never having to suck in my stomach
Having a nightly loaded baked potato

5 things I miss about not being pregnant:

Wine
Sushi
Not peeing every 10 minutes
Wine
Being able to bend over

5 things I’m excited about with a second baby:

Holding my babies on my lap together – just the thought of it gives me the warm and fuzzies
Watching Peanut love on her tiny sibling
Teaching Peanut that she is not the center of our world…in a good way
Snuggling a newborn and smelling his or her little head
Watching my husband snuggling our newborn and smelling his or her head

5 things that scare the stuffing out of me about adding another baby:

Paying attention to 2 babies! Some days I can barely handle one
Watching Peanut not being the center of our world…something I can’t imagine right now
Breastfeeding a newborn while dealing with a toddler
Never leaving the house again because of 1 and 3
Never having time for my husband again

and now it’s your turn – Are you a parent? What are 5 things that can tell me that’ll help with our transition?

Thanks so much for talking about your pregnancy, Kat! Being pregnant and then having a newborn with a toddler at home scares me too, so I’d love to know how other readers have made the leap from one to two kids.

A giant rubber ducky & some Friday links

December 14, 2012

In perhaps the goofiest publicity stunt I’ve ever seen, a giant rubber duck floated down the River Thames in London this week to encourage Britons to have more fun. Could you imagine seeing a 50ft yellow duck passing under the Tower Bridge? What if Levi saw it in person? He would’ve gone crazy quacking!